Matt: Ah good old afternoon coffee..
Miklos: Yeah... nothing beats it.. well, maybe not being at work would.
Matt: Morning coffee beats it...
Miklos: Hah.. yeah, I guess most things would, really..
Matt: Yeah.. it's not that great.

Miklos: my loan is done june 2012, at this rate
Nikki: mine's done somewhere in the late 2200s. Hopefully that's A.D. but they don't specify.

Nikki: you want your sandwich toasted like a pervert? or regular, like i'll have it?
Miklos: hrm... given those options... toasted please. regular!

Nikki: Did you see that? That street was called "Chalk Line"
Miklos: Yeah I saw I was already thinking about the .com
Nikki: Probably taken.
Miklos: You assume a lot...
Nikki: And you assume the internet is a week old.

Tom: i just wanna wash my cup, it's got some brown stuff in it
Miklos: is it poo?
Tom: well if it is, it's the sweetest poo i ever tasted
Miklos: oh.. you have something to compare it to?

[After Miklos almost pulled his dad under the car when he was still getting in the back door]
Miklos: Sorry Daddy.
Dad: It's okay junior, you just almost killed me that's all.

Miklos: look, it's Cash Dylan Otis. Why is that baby so RED?

Pircsi: how do i have a tv channel thats 63.99 [that's not a price, it's the actual channel]
miklos: it's your bday
miklos: it's a party... it doesn't have to make sense

Miklos: Then in the elevator, it was me, Carolyn from accounting, Bonnie, me... Costy, and me. No wait, Costy wasn't there.
Nikki: Well I'm glad you were there to retell the story...

miklos: the 90s with all the family sitcoms
miklos: where'd they go
Nikki: well, i think all the child stars went to rehab

Nikki: hey guess what i'm using as a chair
miklos: a chair?
Nikki: that exercise ball!
miklos: oh
miklos: good for posture
Nikki: well
miklos: just needs some more air
Nikki: i'm still slouching, just a new way
Nikki: but it's comfy
miklos: i always condone innovative slouching
miklos: i'm the king of slouching at work, sometimes only my head sticks out from under the desk
miklos: people constantly comment on it

Miklos: "Tainted Love"; or its original title, "Love in the Taint".

Nikki: Tea no good?
miklos: Nah, it's good...
Nikki: Then what are you doing?
miklos: Dumping most of it...
Nikki: Why?
miklos: Not enough honey... (dumping tea down the drain)
Nikki: Haha.. are you serious? Why not just add more?
miklos: oh yeah..

Miklos: I think you're a gaybo ... who uses that word in 2010?
Nikki: Apparently you do.
Miklos: I got so mad at that bald cop [on '24'] yesterday that I called him a 'fag'!

Nikki: You know what you should do? Try the Kelloggs diet.
Miklos: No diets.
Nikki: It's not a diet ...

Miklos: i printed out the military alphabet
Miklos: and posted it on my wall
Miklos: and i plan to learn it and use it
Miklos: i know most of them
Nikki: oh, your actual wall
Miklos: haha yeah
Miklos: real life.
Nikki: they have those now

Nikki: I gotta go to the bathroom. Turn on some music... something in the key of G.
Miklos: Is G minor ok? (Starting to play Adagio http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mz4dpbk8YBs)
Nikki: No! That's too depressing.. Try key of D...
Miklos: Nah this is good...

Miklos: Ahh...
Nikki: What?
Miklos: I googled Google.
Nikki: Did the world explode? That's what I always thought would happen.

Miklos: Can we get over this whole farting thing and let'em loose already?
Nikki: You're still afraid of me doing it, aren't you? So you better clam up!

Miklos: Good news is that you get a free $60 bill from me today if you take me to a bank.
Alex: How's that gonna work out?
Miklos: Obviously there's no $60 bill...
Alex: No.. I'm thinking ahead here... $60, that's not divisible by 20.
Miklos: Umm, yes it is.. You're not thinking far enough ahead I guess!
Alex: Well I was thinking the machine will give you a 50 and that's in 20 increments.
Miklos: Umm, no it's not.
Alex: Oh shit, there's no winning here!