Sanyi: The new "BC" is going to be "before covid".
Miklos: Calendar reset in 2020. This is year 1.
Miklos: I was born in 39 BC.

Alex: Sooo, in theory it should work
[Siri: I'm sorry I didn't get that]
Alex: I didn't say "Hey Siri" I said "In Theory!"

Sanyi: If you walk like a duck, the duck will quack.

Alex: Omg I just realized I have my underwear on backwards. No wonder why it felt really uncomfortable on the elliptical this morning.

Alex: You know, there is probably a universe out there where the keyboard types on us

Alex: Everyone seems to be driving like an idiot today and it's just torture.
Jessica: To be fair, the speed limit is 40 here.
Alex: I don't care about speed limits. I care about MY limits.

Curtis: So if memory serves me right, Spinney might be around Hamilton for sushi on Friday or Monday
Alex: And if the waitresses serve us right, we should get everything we ordered

(After waiting in a drive thru on the way to work)
Alex: ffs train
Curtis: Dafuq? Which Tims do you go to?
Alex: McDonalds

Alex: I've never seen the Wizard of Oz but what's the point of watching it? I already know there's a scarecrow, a tin man, and a wolf man. What else is there to know?!

Curtis: I kinda hate Cogeco's new beta website
Curtis: *Provides link*
Alex: Oh yeah, me too - there's a lot of work they'd still need to do
Alex: For example, a complete overhaul

Alex: Don't you like that Baxo guy? He tells it like it is.
Well..he tells it like he'd like it to be.

Alex: Soirée. Doesn't that sound fancy?
Jessica: No, it sounds French.

*Alex falls asleep reading something on Jessica's phone*
Jessica: Can I have my phone back if you're gonna fall asleep?
Alex: Yeah, just pull the cord.
*Jessica pulls the cord and it gets stuck*
Alex: Ahh! That's my face!

Alex: Thank god we have seats at the concert tonight. I sat for so long today that I don't feel like standing anymore

(Random interruption after Jessica is talking to Alex for 5 minutes)
Alex: Okay I'm having a brain fart. What was Clinton's first name?

Alex: Justin Trudeau: you may think he's shifty but everything he says is "True-deau."
Jessica: Where do you come up with this stuff?
Alex: Out of my own head.
Alex: Do you use Pillbury when you bake?
Jessica: No..
Alex: Because that's the only true dough.

Brian: What's the date today? 13?
Alex: Thursday the 13th.
Brian: So tomorrow's Friday the 13th.
Alex: umm...

Curtis: Come across any memorable humour recently in agents of shield?
Alex: Oh a lot
Curtis: Share 3 with me so I can reminisce
Alex: I'd have to remember

[While talking about the Saved By The Bell reunion on The Tonight Show]
Alex: Of course they couldn't get Screech in there because he's in jail
Alex: Oh wait, apparently he's bailed out
Curtis: Saved by the bail

Curtis: I have Taylor Swift looping in my head again
Alex: Just shake it off