John: Ugh. I wish black olives didn't taste so strong. I'm eating a sweet sub, then BAM.. it's right there.
Nikki: You ordered black olives though.
John: Of course I did. You have to. Nothing in life is perfect.
Nikki: So you order black olives so that you don't enjoy the sub *too* much.
John: Mmhmm.
[overhears a guy asking for black olives]
Nikki: That guy knows what's up.

John: Wow, so that guy [King Charles] will be on our coins now?

[watching Wheel of Fortune, one of the contestant's name is Gary]
Miklos: Wow, a young guy named Gary.
John: Yeah, I always think of Garys as old grumpy men with less fingers than they need.

[driving along Hwy 3]
Nikki: Are you speeding?
Miklos: Yeah, a bit... But still not going as fast as this guy [car passes in left lane]. I'm going 95 and he's going like 107.
Nikki: How'd you come up with that number?
Miklos: Well the rate of speed he's getting away from us and my super brain powers...
Nikki: How'd you do in school? Were you good in Math class?
Miklos: Let's put it this way. Was the grading system a percentage or a points system?

[talking about an Spiny (jui.cc/xu) in Super Mario Odyssey after the Spiny kills him]
Johnny: That guy is just a tick in a shell. He's a loser.

[driving along the backroads]
Miklos: Hey, didn't we see this guy walking his dogs on the other road earlier?
Johnny: Imagine he was just plopped into this spot when we got near him like in Minecraft?
Miklos: Yeah .. like "if player near this point, then *plop*."
Johnny: But life isn't code, dad.
Miklos: What if it is? What if there's something bigger that programmed it all and we don't even know about it?
Johnny: I mean, we could be inside a giant cat's eyeball!
[Miklos laughs]
Johnny: Because Rico's eye looks like a universe. And dad, next time don't laugh at that because it's serious.

Johnny: What's that from?
Miklos: A movie called Forrest Gump
Johnny: [pause] Is that a movie about a guy pooping in the woods?
Miklos: I said Gump, not dump

Miklos: You're a smart guy. You know what I am?
John: A destroyed man.

[driving by a funeral home]
Johnny: Dad, why is that funeral guy there?
Miklos: There is a funeral going on right now.
Johnny: A funeral? Why?
Miklos: Yes, there are funerals all the time. You know, people die every day, it’s just a part of life.
Johnny: Funerals are so embarrassing.
Miklos: Embarrassing? Why?
Johnny: Because. You just sit there. And it’s embarrassing.
Miklos: It’s not embarrassing, it’s sad.
Johnny: It’s sad and embarrassing.

[playing Mario Kart]
Johnny: Why is his name Bowser dad?
Miklos: I don’t know, why is this guy’s name Mario?
Johnny: Because! His mother named him Mario when he was a baby!

Nikki: This guy's so annoying. He thinks he's 14 but he's actually like 77.

Alex: Don't you like that Baxo guy? He tells it like it is.
Well..he tells it like he'd like it to be.

[channel surfing and stumbling upon the music video Sam Smith - I'm Not The Only One]
Miklos: ugh this guy is white?
Nikki: I know eh? He sounds like a sweet black man.
Nikki: now I don't like him hehe

Alex: That guy looks like a buffoon! And I've never used the word buffoon, but that man is a buffoon!

(while driving past the Little Caesar's sign-swinging guy currently moving the sign like a steering wheel)
Miklos: [in a sad fading voice] "I'm driving you awaaayy..."

Miklos: that guy [down the street] has a hook for a hand
Nikki: do you think he's crazy?
Miklos: he's got a hook for a hand! He could've chosen something that looks like a hand... but he chose a hook!

(Overheard random guy at theatre talking to his friend)
Guy: I just tried to spell 'Jesus' and it autocorrected to 'Hernia' how the hell?

Tom: You know in a year you'll see that guy and he'll have one of these [motions with hands indicating a fat lower torso area]
Nikki: The male 'gunt'?
Tom: Hah! Yes. The male gunt.
Nikki: The 'genis'?

[referring to Steve Jobs]
Dad: You know that guy, what the hell is his name? Johnny Workman?

Curtis: do you really not know who sarah palin is?
Curtis: i assumed you were joking but you never know
Alex: i only know everyone referencing her
Alex: i mean it's an easy google research
Alex: i just never bothered to
Curtis: well
Curtis: she woulda been VP of US if the other guy won
Alex: oh
Alex: thats definitely not what i had in mind
Alex: all this time i thought it was some deaf actress
Alex: hahaha
Curtis: that's marlee matlin
baxo: i see that now
Curtis: you got the lin right