[Taking money out of an ATM]
John: Ooh! It's warm!
Miklos: Hmmm.. I wonder why it's warm. It's not like it was just made. *smiles* A bit concerning, isn't it?
Miklos: Feels good though!
John: Feeling good makes you concerned?

[driving around downtown]
Miklos: ok we still have a few minutes to kill before I have to drop you off at school. Wanna do donuts in the No Frills parking lot?
John: you can't do donuts in a front wheel drive car
Miklos: I'll find a way
John: let's not
[a few minutes later]
Miklos: Okay, I'll just turn around up there and we'll head to school
John: turn around where?
Miklos: I'll turn around a few times... up there in the No Frills parking lot.
John: dad...

John: [mimicking the compass] North, East, South, West.. Never Eat Soggy Waffles.
Miklos: [at the same time as John saying "soggy waffles"] Shredded Wheat...
John: What? What is shredded wheat?
Miklos: A cereal brand from the old days. Not as popular now I suppose.
John: Who'd name a cereal "shredded wheat"?

Miklos: John, can you turn the light off?
John: Sorry, my answers are limited. You have to ask the right question.

John: Dad, I love you. I know when you say something dumb you're just expressing yourself.

[finding him huddled into a tree]
Miklos: Whatcha doin'?
John: Surviving on two bars of internet.

John: I like Ford Broncos
Nikki: they're great for when you're running from the police
John: [mutters] for murdering your wife

John: The brain you are messaging is currently unavailable. Please leave a message after the beep

John: What do you call taking photos while diving?
John: Photoswimthesis

[after Dad agreed to set up a tent in the backyard]
John: Oh man I feel like I just drank 7 coffees I'm so energized.

John: I find it weird when parents name their kids childish names. Like "Starlight" for example. They're going to grow up with that name. What if they become a businessman or businesswoman and they'll be like "Starlight K. Osborne" or whatever. It's so weird.

John: When they say, 'the average person', are they just following around the most normal person for his whole life and watching what he does? "This is the most normal person we can find, and now we're going to see what happens to him and write about it for his whole life".

[Jan 5, 2023]
John: I had a dream that was so complicated it would take me 2 hours to explain it, so I'm not even going to.

John: Never close the door to someone else's life; only open the window to your own future.

[out of the blue]
John: Dad, if you were crazy, would you make yourself the only symmetrical thing in the world?

[At Sushi Paradise while eating]
John: I like this Noir Jazz they're playing.

John: Want a million dollars for ten dollars? Come to Shady's Moolah n More. Think of all the possibilities: pay off your home, donate to charity...

Miklos: Brett and Curtis play this game called Civilization
John: I think everyone plays that

Miklos: [about a notification] It's just your grandma liking something on Instagram
John: Which grandma?
Miklos: Grand Mamó
John: Grandma Moe?!

[overheard conversation after swim class]
Phil: do you know [so and so] from YouTube?
John: No, I don't watch YouTube
Phil: why not???
John: My parents don't let me.
Phil: Bruh.....