Miklos: [about a notification] It's just your grandma liking something on Instagram
John: Which grandma?
Miklos: Grand Mamó
John: Grandma Moe?!

[overheard conversation after swim class]
Phil: do you know [so and so] from YouTube?
John: No, I don't watch YouTube
Phil: why not???
John: My parents don't let me.
Phil: Bruh.....

John: Wow, so that guy [King Charles] will be on our coins now?

John: You know what I call the outhouse in my head?
Miklos: What?
John: The s-h-badword shop.
Miklos: Ok but do you say s-h-badword in your head or do you actually say the bad word?
John: I say the bad word because who's going to stop me?

John: Hey dad, would you rather eat your own boogers for a week, or someone else’s for a day?
Miki: Umm, neither.
Pircsi: You have to pick one, it’s a would you rather question.
Miki: Ok, then my own for a week.
John: Good. Me too because that’s what I do.

John: How big is Algonquin Park?
Pircsi: It's massive, the part we see is not even a third of it.
John: What, that's crazy.
Pircsi: It's 7,653 square kilometers.
John: Wow! Where are the good restaurants?

[while eating a cheeseburger]
John: See, I knew it was McDonald's cheese you were putting in my lunch sandwiches, Mom.
Nikki: Processed cheese? Yeah.
John: I'm not going to call it processed cheese. It sounds too important. I'm going to call it McDonald's cheese.

John: Dad, wouldn't it be an awesome Sci Fi book, where somebody puts invisible spray on themselves and they touch a mirror and they fall through the mirror because their reflection is blocking them when they're not invisible but it's not blocking them when they are invisible?

Miklos: When I was little [in Hungary] our neighbour came over and I offered her some of my cream of wheat, but then she slowly kept eating it until she finished it all.
John: [patting Miklos' shoulder] That's OK dad, you have bigger problems now.

John: What did the cheese man say to his cheese kids about his cheese wife?
John: Cheese just the best.

John: Mamo snores loud! It's like turkeys screaming.

Miklos: [as he walked up behind John] Sorry, did I scare you?
John: Yeah, you walked up to me really loud. I was like "oh god, what's _he_ got?"

John: [moving closer to Miklos] I want to watch you do Wordle.
Miklos: Why?
John: Because it's satisfying to watch you lose.

Miklos: I use big words at work sometimes.
John: Why?
Miklos: I like to think it makes me sound smarter.
John: Well I am just flabbergasted.

[watching Wheel of Fortune, one of the contestant's name is Gary]
Miklos: Wow, a young guy named Gary.
John: Yeah, I always think of Garys as old grumpy men with less fingers than they need.

[John talking, Miklos not paying attention]
Miklos: Sorry, I was just thinking about the dashboard. It's a work of art.
John: Why is it a work of art?
Miklos: Because it tells people a lot of information in a simple way.
John: [examining the monitor] Oh.. but where's the power button? [shuts monitor off]
Miklos: So you're just gonna turn the monitor off?
John: Yeah I don't care.

Johnny: Yeah, moms are good for a lot of things. They're like multi-tool pocket knives.

Nikki: Oh what's that? In that tree!
Johnny: they're buds!
Nikki: No, they're fruit! What kind of tree is that?
Miklos: a partridge
Nikki: a partridge is a bird
Miklos: well what's the opposite of that?
Nikki: the opposite of a partridge?? There isn't an opposite of a bird. I think you're thinking of a pear tree.
Miklos: No, what's the tree version of a partridge?

Johnny: I just had an enjoyable moment. You wanna know what it was? My burp tasted like meatloaf.

[on snacking on Timbits for free while working at Tim Hortons]
Johnny: It was borrowing without asking, forever -- until you dropped it in the loo.