Miklos: It's called Weir Road. Johnny: Weir Road. Miklos: Not 'Weird' Road. Johnny: I DIDN'T SAY Weird Road. I said Weir Road! Miklos: Okay, sorry. Johnny: ... Heh, but it is a funny, weird road.
[During a quiet moment while eating lunch after the dog's toenail broke, spurting blood everywhere, following a morning of other small disasters] Johnny: Mom... I think it's time we sell this house.
Johnny: Dad, what makes my fingers move? Miklos: Your brain Johnny: My brain??? Miklos: Yes, it controls everything! Johnny: Even my toes? My hands? My mouth? Miklos: Yes, everything. Johnny: That’s funny. Dad? Miklos: Yes? Johnny: What’s a brain?
[playing Mario Kart] Johnny: Why is his name Bowser dad? Miklos: I don’t know, why is this guy’s name Mario? Johnny: Because! His mother named him Mario when he was a baby!
Johnny: Dad is this Toyota expensive? Miklos: Yeah it'd be expensive if you were to buy it on your own. Johnny: Dad, you can buy it with me any time you want.
Johnny: What's a king? Does a king have a crown? Miklos: Yes a king has a crown. Johnny: What does a queen have? Miklos: A crown too but a smaller one. Johnny: Isn't that called a tiara? Miklos: Yes, how do you know that word? Johnny: I know EVERY word! Miklos: Is that right? Johnny: Yes, a tiara.
Nikki: Do you have a poop? Johnny: No. Nikki: Do you HAVE to poop? You have really gross toots. Johnny: Nope I don't have to and yes I do, I'm very sorry but I still love you though.
[Turning onto Vimy Rd in Port Colborne] Johnny: Dad, this is called wiggling woods because the trees are wiggling. Trees are wood. I want to call them whistling woods but the birds don't want to listen to me.
Nikki: I told [6-month-old] Johnny don't ever get dogs. They're nice but a lot of work. He said "bbbbblllloooooon" so I said yes balloon dogs might be easier
[Miklos making breakfast in the kitchen, Nikki feeding Johnny in the living room] Nikki: Is pee ok, spider? Miklos: What?? Nikki: Is pee ok, spider? In your native language. Miklos: Oh! P-ó-k! Yeah that's spider... I would've never guessed what the hell you were talking about if you didn't say "native language".
Nikki: This queen's stupid. She knights everyone willy-nilly. She knighted Anthony Hopkins a long time ago. She knighted Elton John, she knighted Ben Kingsley... Miklos: She knighted Furniture Warehouse... Nikki: No, YOU-nited Furniture Warehouse!