Miklos: Pogacsa's all gone. Marek ate most of it.
Nikki: Do they have pogacsa in Poland?
Miklos: I don't think so.
Nikki: Really? They love potatoes. By that I mean that I've seen one war-time movie where all they had to eat was potatoes.

[Entering the living room after a nap, noticing]
Nik: You still have tea! Probably ice tea by now.
Miklos: Room tea
Nik: Soon it will be emp-tea.

Nikki: In the war of carnivores vs. vegans, the carnivores just eat the vegans.

Nikki: Just do it. Don't be a pussy.
Nikki: ... I don't use that word. Now I've tried it once, it doesn't work.

Miklos: that guy [down the street] has a hook for a hand
Nikki: do you think he's crazy?
Miklos: he's got a hook for a hand! He could've chosen something that looks like a hand... but he chose a hook!

Nikki: I need as much sushi and pregnancy prejudice based on sushi-consumption as I can get in before birthing this baby

Miklos: How am I at 9300 steps already today? Oh right, I was hammering.
Nikki: Why are you wearing that (Fitbit) on your dominant hand anyway? You hammer with it, you write with it. Why not just put it on your non-dominant hand [like they tell you to]? Because [name withheld] made a comment on your watch and Fitbit picture? 'OH NO, don't wear it on your non-dominant hand with your watch! They won't get along! They're going to fight! Your watch is going to cry! It's not modern enough for the Fitbit!' I don't think so. Go away, [name withheld], I don't even know you.

Miklos: You know why our marriage is effortless?
Nikki: Why's that?
Miklos: Because we both make an effort.
Miklos: Except me..

Miklos: So what happened to the changing of the Canadian anthem thing?
Nikki: Ahh a bunch of scandals happened and then everyone realized that nobody cares.

Miklos: There's gotta be something on PBS worth watching.
Nikki: That's never been said.

Nikki: When people say they'll pray for you... do they really pray for you --
Miklos: Nope.
Nikki: -- or are they just being fuckin' assholes? That's what I think anyway.

Nikki: Lots of things aren't vegan.
Nikki: Do you want to know what's in bagels?
Miklos: What?
Nikki: Bird feathers. It's used as a softening agent.
Miklos: That's not so bad. Who cares, we're all gonna die the same way anyway.. it's not that gross.
Nikki: No, I hate bird feathers!

Nikki: Ugh. You stink.
[Miklos farts loudly again]
Nikki: UGH!! That's it! I'm calling the police!

[Nikki's philosophy on using a Macbook]
Nikki: I hate navigating through Finder on that thing... "and if you swoosh your two hands together, you might be able to navigate to the next screen. But probably not. Because everything's a big fuckin' show...!"

[while talking about bodily differences and 'cycles']
Nikki: I love how men really don't have to deal with anything their whole lives.
Miklos: We have to deal with you.
Nikki: Yeah right. You basically stare off into space your whole lives and at the end you might get butt cancer.
Miklos: But probably not.

Miklos: What's a study?
Nikki: Rich people have offices made of oak and mahogany, and that's what they call a study.

Nikki: This queen's stupid. She knights everyone willy-nilly. She knighted Anthony Hopkins a long time ago. She knighted Elton John, she knighted Ben Kingsley...
Miklos: She knighted Furniture Warehouse...
Nikki: No, YOU-nited Furniture Warehouse!

Nikki: I wish there was a feature in the car that said, "Welcome to the proper side of the road".
Miklos: It'd be called the Saturn Sarcasm.
Nikki: No, it'd be the... Automatic Wife.

Nikki: are you reading this? [An informational sign on Flowerpot Island]
Miklos: no, I don't read... but I am taking a picture of it so that I can OCR scan it later and have the computer read it to me.

Nikki: When I see those [large posters of people with their mouths open outside of a dental office], I want to take a picture that looks like someone's putting something in their mouth. Not a penis.