#391 · Dec 22, 2010
[After having lasagna for lunch]
Miklos: Maybe you should take the rest of this to work tonight.
Nikki: I don't want to be eating lasagna all day.
Nikki: I feel like Garfield.
Nikki: Why does that cat like lasagna so much?
#390 · Dec 20, 2010
Brian: It's almost like you have to watch that one with caps lock on.
Alex: You mean closed captioning?
#389 · Dec 20, 2010
Brian: (repeating a few times) You are the weakest link... goodbye
Brian: what was the name of that show anyway?
Alex: The Weakest Link
#388 · Dec 19, 2010
Miklos: "...building your font cache..."
Nikki: farm cash??
#387 · Nov 23, 2010
[while making a purchase on eBay]
Nikki: Joy and happiness or my money back! I like them odds!
#386 · Oct 31, 2010
Alex: pizza and wings go together. You can't eat one without the other.
Curtis: well I usually only eat one or the other, not together.
Alex: do you also listen to 'We Will Rock You' without listening to 'We Are The Champions'?
#385 · Oct 15, 2010
miklos: I know I'm insensitive
miklos: jann arden wrote a song about me
Nikki: "Good Mother"?
Nikki: (swish)
#384 · Oct 12, 2010
Nikki: you got your keys?
miklos: I don't need them
Nikki: how about your YMCA card.... which doesn't look like you anymore at all
miklos: you mean i don't look like that now?
Nikki: haha no you do not have a face like a human hamburger.
#383 · Oct 12, 2010
miklos: I'm eating sunflower seeds
Nikki: why eat seeds when you are a nut?
#381 · Sep 25, 2010
(Eric reads an advertisement on a truck: "Maintenance by the yard")
Eric: I wonder what [they] charge by the yard. Like 5 cents or something?
Alex: Well I got a front yard and a back yard, would that be 10 cents?

#380 · Sep 25, 2010
Miklos: Why is toilet paper so expensive?
Nikki: I know... That's why you buy it when it's $4 at Shoppers and I have a dollar off coupon.
Miklos: I had to borrow 3 rolls from my mom today, we were out.
Nikki: Why don't you ever look in the storage room?
Miklos: Oh yeah, I keep forgetting it's more than just a server room.
Nikki: I'm stocked up on everything! I'm not some... hoochie mama.
Nikki: If there was an apocalypse tomorrow and we happened to be the last people alive, I have everything we'd need at least until we could break into a Walmart.
#379 · Sep 23, 2010
Nikki: Remember when your dad found out how to queue YouTube videos in a playlist before we did, and then he was like... "What? I'm not STUPID!"
#378 · Sep 17, 2010
Nikki: i went to my purse to get a pen
Nikki: and instead i ended up swiffering and sweeping (still haven't swiffer wet-mopped)
Nikki: then makeupping
Nikki: then hairing
Nikki: then packing food and bathroom stuff
Nikki: (including towels and toothbrushes)
Miklos: hell of a detour
Nikki: and then finding my bag to pack my clothes in
Nikki: and now I'm back at the laptop realizing i haven't got that pen yet
#377 · Sep 17, 2010
Alex: then, when the theater is done.. i'm going to start on my winter project of making actual robots that play live music instruments
Teja: i think its time you start your humping project
Teja: You have already invested in your junior for almost 25 years its time for rewards now
#376 · Sep 15, 2010
LCBO cashier: Do you collect Air Miles?
Curtis: Nope
Old guy behind Curtis in line: They still haven't converted to kilometres yet eh?
#375 · Sep 9, 2010
Andrea: So my friend had to get her colon taken out the other day.
Alex: So what does she have now? A semi-colon?
#374 · Sep 8, 2010
Alex: I was at marshville demonstrating shingle making over the weekend.
Brian: Oh yeah how did it go? Was it Pop-Lar?
Alex: Yes actually, Every Shingle Time!
#373 · Aug 17, 2010
Miklos: Pledge me for the MS Bike Tour!
Matt: Gimme 20 bucks and I will...
Miklos: How much will you pledge me then?
Matt: $10
#372 · Aug 14, 2010
Alex: by the way .. Back to the future delorean is going to be at the seaway mall between 1 - 4 my brother saw it driving down niagara st haha
Mikkel: today?!
Alex: yers
Mikkel: fak off
Alex: as in 30 minutes from now i shit you not
Mikkel: god damnit
Alex: too bad i promised my buddy i'll meet him for lunch in the falls
Mikkel: hahaha i know eh
Alex: hes from brampton so i cant blow him off
Mikkel: yeah fair enough
Alex: maybe i can make it back in time to see it
Mikkel: hahahaha zing!
Alex: hahahahahah i didnt even realize what i said!
#371 · Jul 30, 2010
Stacey: Thanks for making me laugh, its cheering me up a bit. Got any good jokes?
Alex: I dont need jokes to generate laughter! I'm just like a laughter vending machine. Just pop in a quarter!
Stacey: In that case here's 4 quarters, whatcha got?
Alex: A dollar!
#370 · Jul 27, 2010
Curtis: so apparently jailbreaking was made legal today
Curtis: in the states at least
#369 · Jul 20, 2010
Mr Sikora: Augh. There's something in my eye. (rubbing it)
Dad: Stop doing that! Your face is so ugly!
(moments later)
Dad: What you got in there, a dinosaur??
#368 · Jul 20, 2010
Dad: (upon seeing mom rolling her shorts up while standing in the water, fishing) Look at that. She's getting a nudity soon.
#367 · Jul 20, 2010
Dad: (to the tune of "Pretty Woman") Paparucca, walking on the lake...
#366 · Jul 20, 2010
Dad: (fishing on a foggy morning) I went out this morning, and I couldn't see anything! It was like a milk!
#365 · Jul 20, 2010
Dad: (about a mean lady) That's why she's a broomhandle witch!
#364 · Jul 10, 2010
Miklos: I'm gonna make a more secure wireless network, WPA-Enterprise.. with a certificate server... so nerdy.
Miklos: I just don't feel secure with the way it's set up...
Nikki: Do you think the people next door are smart enough to figure it out as is?
Nikki: If they were, they'd have a job.
#363 · Jul 8, 2010
Ryan: My milkshake brings all the honey's to the yard
Cynthia: I don't know about honeys, but I heard a whole lot of boys were heading down...
Alex: Worker bees generally bring honey to my yard.
Ryan: well my milkshake took over shop!
Alex: Your milkshake sounds like another wal-mart screwing over local businesses!
#362 · Jun 29, 2010
Curtis: Ok, so I just got some info and instead of relaying the info, I'll turn it into a question. What will I have to do sim card wise when I get my phone?
Alex: put it in the phone
#361 · Jun 29, 2010
Brett: This property is like what, 15 acres?
Alex: Sixteen
Chey: How big is an acre anyway?
Alex: 1/16th of this property.
#360 · Jun 27, 2010
Nikki: Hey boy?
Miklos: hey... girl
Nikki: Yes?
Miklos: Hi.
[pause]
Both: What were you going to say?
Both: [in same tone] Oohhhh.
#359 · Jun 18, 2010
[Boss's orders: Everyone in the store must wear name tags]
Alex: Could you hand out these name tags, I don't know who everyone is.
Head Cashier: Well, maybe you should find out then.
Alex: I'll know after they're wearing their name tags.
[Maybe she'll learn not to give Alex attitude again]
#358 · Jun 18, 2010
[While Setting up a label format for a retail chain logo printed on scales]
Brian: Hey Bill. I'm sending you 4 different scaled versions. 1 to 4 is from largest to smallest. If you need any smaller, just let me know. Photoshop does wonders working with bitmaps. Thanks, Brian.
Developer: Hey Brian. try to get to 160 W x 116 H pixels - or close to it . I do mine in paint. Thanks, Bill.

#357 · Jun 14, 2010
[talking about UFC 115]
Matt: That guy should've finished off Crocop in the first round. It looked like he wanted to keep going with him though.
Miklos: Yeah.. and then they hug in the middle of the round..
Matt: I don't know what kind of mind frame you'd have to be in to be able to do that.. You'd have to be a psycho.
Miklos: Or fight enough times that it really becomes like a job.. Sort of like me and you coding.. And now we're talking.. then back to coding.
Matt: .....yeah. EXACTLY like that...
Miklos: Haha, less blood though...
Matt: So far, less blood...

[Miklos gets random nose bleed 5 minutes later]
#356 · Jun 14, 2010
Alex: i just thought of shaving like 1/5th of my left eyebrow and completing it with a tattoo of the Audi emblem and calling it Brow-di
#355 · Jun 9, 2010
<Curtis and Miklos discussing the dagh facebook app>
Miklos: haha it was a work in progress
Miklos: the idea was that you could submit a dagh quote right from facebook
Miklos: i just never got around to finishing it
Miklos: it's still very doable i think. wouldn't even need much! just an add page
Miklos: it would still email the admins for approval though
Miklos: maybe. or it can skip approval if it's from facebook, since it's a real facebook person adding the quote...
Curtis: so approval is just a matter of non-spam?
Miklos: actually the approval was originally for non funny quotes
Miklos: or racist ones etc
Curtis: that's what i thought it still is
Miklos: yeah it still is
Curtis: heh, well alright then
Miklos: this is confusing
Miklos: nothing will change.
Curtis: you'll be ok
Miklos: life is wonderful
[few minutes later]
Nikki: This quote should've gone through the approval process
#354 · Jun 8, 2010
Miklos: Alright, what are we going to buy .. hang on, I have a list.
[Miklos finds someone's grocery list on top of a shopping cart at the grocery store]
Miklos: Wow this person wants lots of milk.
Nikki: Really, they put that down?
Miklos: Well, we have "yogurt", melba, milk, banana, apples, cookies, milk, t-cream, white cake mix, granola bars
Nikki: Actually that sounds like a pretty solid list to me...
Miklos: Definitely not a first time shopper.
Nikki: Yeah, totally devoid of ramen noodles.
#353 · Jun 3, 2010
Nikki: You're boring today.
Miklos: I'm not boring, I'm restful.
Nikki: You're supposed to rest at NIGHT.
Miklos: It's 2 in the morning in Hungary.
Nikki: Oh right. So I could say "It's 2 in the morning somewhere else, so I guess I don't have to be at work right now," and then go home and no one would fire me for being stupid.
#352 · May 29, 2010
Alex: what's that guy's deal?
Eric: I think that's a girl.
Alex: really?
Eric: Yeah, look at the hips. And sports bra.
Alex: Oh yeah! Eww, then I know what his deal is.
#351 · May 29, 2010
<Alex is showing Gareth the Audi>
Gareth: Sweet. I like the floor mats - are those stock?
Alex: Everything on this car is stock.
Gareth: Sweet.
Alex: Wait, did you say floor mats? Cuz those aren't factory.
#350 · May 27, 2010
Miklos: If Apple jumped off a bridge, would the world follow?
Goran: So long as the bridge is prettier, sleeker, but arguably less functional than comparable bridges.
Miles: And they had to pay a hefty premium toll to get onto the bridge.
Alex: And if it's a bigger bridge that has the same features as a smaller bridge and gets opened to Americans sooner than Canadians
#349 · May 24, 2010
Brian: We're here to work on tills
Boss: On tills what?
Alex: un-tillz we get them done!
#348 · May 20, 2010
Nikki: mixi runs down the stairs, and i say "no treats, mixi!"
Nikki: "meow?"
Nikki: "no tuna!"
Nikki: "...nooo?"
Nikki: "nope"
Nikki: "aww"
Nikki: that is what her meows sounded like she was saying
#347 · May 19, 2010
Eric: how do you protect wireless though
Eric: 'snip' the antenna off
Brian: THROW A DOME OVER THE ANTENNA
#346 · May 6, 2010
Matt: Ah good old afternoon coffee..
Miklos: Yeah... nothing beats it.. well, maybe not being at work would.
Matt: Morning coffee beats it...
Miklos: Hah.. yeah, I guess most things would, really..
Matt: Yeah.. it's not that great.
#345 · May 3, 2010
Miklos: my loan is done june 2012, at this rate
Nikki: mine's done somewhere in the late 2200s. Hopefully that's A.D. but they don't specify.
#344 · May 3, 2010
Nikki: you want your sandwich toasted like a pervert? or regular, like i'll have it?
Miklos: hrm... given those options... toasted please. regular!
#343 · Apr 7, 2010
Brian: you ever program in SSH?
#342 · Apr 4, 2010
Nikki: i ate some horseradish a few weeks ago after a lifelong resistance to it as well
Goran: is it not delicious?
Nikki: i'd say it was "pretty good"
Goran: mmm. i can see endless possibilities of tastiness
Nikki: i wonder if a lot of people avoid it until they're nearly 26
Goran: :O it's like a right of passage
Nikki: rite. i think it's rite, though i could be rong
#341 · Apr 2, 2010
Nikki: Did you see that? That street was called "Chalk Line"
Miklos: Yeah I saw I was already thinking about the .com
Nikki: Probably taken.
Miklos: You assume a lot...
Nikki: And you assume the internet is a week old.